tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6980781483343691022024-03-13T23:30:23.753-05:00Thoughts While DrivingWhatever rattles around long enough in my head to get some kinda narrative.Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.comBlogger90125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-27660036486400660702017-07-12T18:54:00.000-05:002017-07-12T18:54:35.511-05:00MeI don't want any great thing out of life. My only long-term goal is to be there for my kids. The only thing I can honestly say I want out of the future is to travel, and travel well. Don't yet have the money for consistent travel.<br />
<br />
Day-to-day I enjoy work accomplishments. I enjoy yoga and exercise. I enjoy food and drink. I enjoy stories!! The stories in music, in movies, in books, in shows. I enjoy sharing those things.<br />
<br />
I don't seek more. I am not out there trying to make something else happen. I don't make demands. I don't want to be a collection of needs.<br />
<br />
I am there for others as I am able, with no agenda and no timeline. I experience. I share. I observe myself and others. I ponder and contemplate. I simply be. Day-to-day.<br />
<br />
<br />Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-71446804659107023392017-02-23T10:43:00.000-06:002017-02-23T10:43:57.037-06:00The Power Selfish<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Those with power who are selfish and use the political
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Pitting the populace against itself results in both
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conflict, on which the power selfish thrive and profit. </div>
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If you feel any animosity whatsoever against any subset
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You must resist the temptation to repress and exclude
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repressing and excluding others then you are creating the very thing you fear,
creating the very thing you want to eliminate. You are creating an antagonistic
bizarro-world doppelganger. Someone who is just like you, and yet the opposite
of you, and aligning yourselves as adversaries. You yourself are becoming the
very thing you fear.</div>
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Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-80866748057229051292016-11-23T13:35:00.000-06:002016-11-23T13:35:50.943-06:00Hot Yoga Cold Beer<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="List Continue 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Message Header"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="11" QFormat="true" Name="Subtitle"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Salutation"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Date"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text First Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Note Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Body Text Indent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Block Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Hyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="FollowedHyperlink"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="22" QFormat="true" Name="Strong"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="20" QFormat="true" Name="Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Document Map"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Plain Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="E-mail Signature"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Top of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Bottom of Form"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal (Web)"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Acronym"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Address"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Cite"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Code"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Definition"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Keyboard"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Preformatted"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Sample"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Typewriter"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="HTML Variable"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Normal Table"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="annotation subject"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="No List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Outline List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Simple 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Classic 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Colorful 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Columns 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Grid 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 7"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table List 8"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table 3D effects 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Contemporary"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Elegant"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Professional"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Subtle 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Web 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Balloon Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" Name="Table Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" UnhideWhenUsed="true"
Name="Table Theme"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Placeholder Text"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="1" QFormat="true" Name="No Spacing"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" SemiHidden="true" Name="Revision"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="34" QFormat="true"
Name="List Paragraph"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="29" QFormat="true" Name="Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="30" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Quote"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="60" Name="Light Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="61" Name="Light List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="62" Name="Light Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="63" Name="Medium Shading 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="64" Name="Medium Shading 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" Name="Medium List 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="66" Name="Medium List 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="67" Name="Medium Grid 1 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="68" Name="Medium Grid 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="69" Name="Medium Grid 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="70" Name="Dark List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="71" Name="Colorful Shading Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="72" Name="Colorful List Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="73" Name="Colorful Grid Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="19" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="21" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Emphasis"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="31" QFormat="true"
Name="Subtle Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="32" QFormat="true"
Name="Intense Reference"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="33" QFormat="true" Name="Book Title"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="37" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" Name="Bibliography"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="39" SemiHidden="true"
UnhideWhenUsed="true" QFormat="true" Name="TOC Heading"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="41" Name="Plain Table 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="42" Name="Plain Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="43" Name="Plain Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="44" Name="Plain Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="45" Name="Plain Table 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="40" Name="Grid Table Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="Grid Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 5"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="Grid Table 1 Light Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="Grid Table 2 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="Grid Table 3 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="Grid Table 4 Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="Grid Table 5 Dark Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="Grid Table 6 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="Grid Table 7 Colorful Accent 6"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46" Name="List Table 1 Light"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51" Name="List Table 6 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52" Name="List Table 7 Colorful"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 1"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 2"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
Name="List Table 7 Colorful Accent 3"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="46"
Name="List Table 1 Light Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="47" Name="List Table 2 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="48" Name="List Table 3 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="49" Name="List Table 4 Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="50" Name="List Table 5 Dark Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="51"
Name="List Table 6 Colorful Accent 4"/>
<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="52"
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I am often asked things like, “What did you do over the
weekend?” “What are doing during the break?” And the ever popular, “how do you
spend your free time?” For several years my answer has been, “Hot yoga and cold
beer.” Announced in an amusing tone with a completely serious expression. In
the unlikely event you are reading this, you may be wondering, what has he been
doing since his last blog post? I’ll tell you. Hot yoga and cold beer.</div>
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For over a year now both of my kids have been out of the
house. Granted, they weren’t always there to begin with, being divorced and
all. They stayed at my house 14 -15 nights a month. They were half-way in the house,
and now they are fully out of the house, save for holiday visits and the odd
weekend. I have become what could be described as an empty next bachelor. What
does any empty next bachelor do?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let us
examine a typical week, you can fill in the rest. </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText">
<br /></div>
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Work. There is work. Gotta have a job, right? Gotta
contribute to the local economic matrix. I enjoy work the most when I don’t
care about what is going on at work. The place isn’t run the way I would run
it, and I don’t run it, so it is better if I mostly stay out of it. Mostly.</div>
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Weekdays. My norm is to hit a 6:30 yoga class. Well, half
the classes are yoga. At one point the classes at the studio were pretty much
all yoga. They have diversified. Half yoga and half fitness classes.
Regardless, I still say I am going to "yoga” even if half the time it ain’t
yoga. After a 6:30 class I get home around 8. This is decision time. Actually I
have two decision points. The first is at 6PM, where I decide whether or not to
make a left turn at Albuquerque, as I call it. If I do make a left turn at
Albuquerque then I am skipping hot yoga and going straight to cold beer. It
happens. After class I decide if I want to follow hot yoga with cold beer. That is 50/50.
In any case, I am usually in bed by 11. It’s a school night, ya know. </div>
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The first big decision on weekends is one hot yoga class,
or two hot yoga classes. The second big decision on weekends is when do I start
drinking cold beer. The time of year is important, not because of how hot or
cold it is outside, because of football. I enjoy watching college football,
that’s on Saturdays. I don’t care much for the NFL, and care even less for the
Dallas Cowboys. Even so, it is enjoyable to watch a game and care not about the
outcome. I can appreciate any good play for what it is, people watch, drink
cold beer (of course), and embrace the energy of the crowd as they cheer or
groan.</div>
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During football season if I do do two hot yoga classes I
will do them back-to-back in the morning. Thus beginning my imbibing of cold
beer in the area of afternoon. Outside of football season I will more likely do
a morning hot yoga and a late afternoon hot yoga, and probably not have any
cold beer at all on Sundays. </div>
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<br /></div>
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That about covers my time spent as an empty nest
bachelor. Now it is time for some hot yoga and some cold beer. Cheers!</div>
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Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-39103482668325842812015-10-26T12:43:00.000-05:002015-10-26T12:43:06.271-05:00More Dating Stories<br /><br />
<br /><br />
Made ya look!!<br />
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<br />Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-20486089649917628942015-10-23T16:03:00.000-05:002015-10-23T16:03:00.671-05:00Gender Me This
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<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There has been many an article, blog, news story, and
discussion regarding the treatment and perception of women as seen through the
lens of men. Just about any book or movie. GamerGate. Sexual assaults on
college campuses. Fewer women in positions of power. Celebrity nude photos.
Doxing. Less pay for women. Imposter Syndrome. Lean in. Many of these musings
have a similar point: that women are defined by men. Having grown up in a
culture where women are defined by men, women have been conditioned to believe
and accept this definition. The current rise in discussions about women’s
treatment in relation to men is due to women no longer buying into this
paradigm.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">All throughout history, and even today in parts of world,
women were considered the property of men. This great historical weight is not
easily moved or overcome. The fight for gender equality, largely beginning in
the 1960’s is still, 50 years later, in its early stages. As a society and
culture we are shining a light into the dark corners of masculinity, the alpha
male, macho men – the male perspective that has worked tirelessly promoting
their own agenda to the determent of women. Shining this light to expose the
narcissism and selfishness of men.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Almost all TV shows, movies, books, our entire culture!
All of these place women into a certain light, paint women into a certain
corner, defined by men. Over the decades in film and TV, who has created and
controlled the image of women? Women's bodies have always been used in
advertising to attract, peddle, and sell. Does a woman feel sexy based on what
she thinks is sexy? Or what men think is sexy? Is a woman's behavior based on
what she wants? Or is it a male ideal, a template, bombarding her since her
earliest memories?</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As you read the following quote consider that men have
defined the reality in which women live.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">"Think for yourself. Question authority. Throughout
human history, as our species has faced the frightening, terrorizing fact that
we do not know who we are, or where we are going in this ocean of chaos, it has
been the authorities, the political, the religious, the educational authorities
who attempted to comfort us by giving us order, rules, regulations, informing,
forming in our minds their view of reality. To think for yourself you must
question authority and learn how to put yourself in a state of vulnerable,
open-mindedness; chaotic, confused, vulnerability to inform yourself. Think for
yourself. Question authority."</span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">"Forming in our minds their view of reality."
In our culture and society as girls grow into women what has formed in their
minds is men's view of reality. Question what has formed in your mind, and
determine if that is indeed your true self.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And now a related tangent. Just for funsies. I want to
talk about these things.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The first season of True Detective written by author Nic
Pizzolatto. Do men hate women? Or do men hate themselves and feel better about
themselves by mistreating women? It comes down to ego and status, power and
control. I AM A MAN, DAMMIT!! In the first season of True Detective there is a
decades long sexual subjection and serial murders of women and children. One
man so emotionally neutered that he forgoes close relationships. A second man
so caught up in the bravado of masculinity that he ignores his wife and
daughters and commits multiple infidelities. The TV show received heavy
criticism for treating women poorly, with stereotypically weak-women or
women-in-peril characters, and generally being anti-feminist.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Female characters are indeed marginalized, the focus of
the show being two men compartmentalized by their own machoism, who end up with
only each other. True Detective, season one perpetuates the old school paradigm
of women existing at best as accessories to men, and at worst to be used by
men, often brutally, and then discarded. It is a male-centric story, which is
fine, but it fails to include real-life female characters. It fails to treat
any women in the story with respect. Is this laziness? Or is this simply
another cookie-cutter, traditional crime story about men being men, and women
defined by those men?</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Girl with the Dragon Tattoo novels by Stieg Larsson.
Adapted into three Swedish movies, and one Hollywood version. The original
title was The Men Who Hate Women, a searing indication of the theme. There is
another decades long sexual subjection and serial murders of women. Forced
prostitution. A cabal of men in government who ignore the abuse of a woman, and
who lead the charge in the abuse of her daughter. The lead male character,
Mikael Blomkvist, while seemingly the most sympathetic towards women treats his
romantic partners with indifference. Lisobeth Salander, the central character
and heroin, stands in stark relief to the cookie-cutter women portrayed in
popular culture.</span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Lisobeth has suffered her entire life at the hands of
brutal and selfish men. As an adult she embraces and exudes her true identity,
yet still the target of the sexual tyranny of men and their abuses. Stieg
Larsson is not perpetuating the male-centric idea of female identify, he is
crucifying it. Drawn and quartered with its entrails pulled out for all to see.
The male view of female sexuality is not romanticized. The entitlement men
believe they have over women results in at best indifference, and more likely
in assault, rape and murder. Juxtaposed by the non-conforming image and
behavior of Lisobeth who eventually triumphs over the selfish brutality of men.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">"Think for yourself. Question authority."</span></div>
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Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-26265113577864798712015-10-09T12:57:00.000-05:002015-10-09T12:57:24.599-05:00Me and My Not White Privilege
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">"Power from unearned privilege can look like
strength when it is in fact permission to escape or to dominate."</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Backpack</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">by Peggy McIntosh</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am white. Thus by definition I must have white
privilege. What is white privilege? This thing, this apparent power I never
knew I had until someone who didn't like it told me I had it? White privilege
is what racists give to white people while they are being racist to non-white
people. Just as the victim of racism cannot control the racist, or the acts of
racism, so the victim of white privilege cannot control the racist, or the acts
of white privilege. Each is a byproduct of racism.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What am I to do about receiving white privilege from
racists? Black people learn how to alter their behavior to avoid being targets
of racism. In the past few years I have heard black parents relate stories of
how they teach their children how to avoid confrontations with police. I know
of a black man with a good job and great career who drove a very nice car but
grew tired of being pulled over so he reverted to driving a not so nice car. My
white privilege is I do not have to teach my children about how to avoid
confrontations with police. My white privilege is I don't get pulled over as
often. My white privilege is I do not arouse suspicions when I browse in a
department store. My white privilege is I am less likely to serve prison time,
I more likely to receive a better education, and I am more likely to find
decent pay for a decent job. Is that really white privilege?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What am I to do about receiving white privilege from
racists? The problem with racism is not black people, the problem is the
racists. The problem with white privilege is not white people, the problem is
the racists. Of course, in this example the racists are white. Racists can also
be black, and in those situations is there a such a thing as black privilege?
If I am a victim of racism at the hands of a black person then it stands to
reason there are some who are victims of black privilege. Or brown privilege.
Or yellow privilege. Or whatever privilege. Just as historically in culture and
society men have held the power and so sexism by men is seen rightfully as the
greater evil, historically in culture and society white people have held the
power and so racism by white people is seen rightfully as the greater evil.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What is up with the "white privilege" movement?
There are many who never witness racism and thus say racism is not a problem.
Those combatting racism shout "white privilege" in an attempt to
raise awareness among those who do not experience racism. "Look! You
receive these benefits because of racism!!" I get it. Raising awareness. Accusing
someone of white privilege just because they are white is racist in and of
itself, and a white person simply receiving a benefit from a racist is not
white privilege.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The term "white privilege" implies an
<em>expectation</em> of favorable treatment based on the color of your skin. This is
form of racism. They are two sides of the same coin, white privilege and overt
racism. On the one side is how you treat others differently (worse) because
they are not your race, and the other side is your <em>expectation</em> of being treated
differently (better) by those the same race as you. </span></div>
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Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-64176804671732624212015-09-17T13:15:00.000-05:002015-09-17T13:15:22.716-05:00Travel BlogShe had to be under 5 feet tall. She was seated, but, yes, not tall in stature. Also very athletic. Somewhat like a gymnast. Alone at first, then a man arrived. Also short, muscular, looks like a gymnast, too. Same skin tone, similar features. If they aren't brother and sister then they look like two people meant to be with each other.<br />
<br />
They talked prior to departure. She mentioned several times she wanted to workout, and she didn't want to get fat. As can be the case a woman's body image is based on an ideal incongruent with her actual body. This is a leap because she didn't actually call herself fat. She does carry a small amount of pudginess that can be attractive on the young.<br />
<br />
For their trip she has planned out where they will eat. Only burger places seem to be listed. If she eats burgers daily then, yes, working out sounds like good life balance choice.<br />
<br />
A man one row up has on a brand new cowboy hat. It is on his head but he is carrying the box, which seems empty. The box says the hat is rodeo style, which I guess means the sides are turned up, like his are.<br />
<br />
Why don't I have a fit bit? I am asked by the mother of my children, one of which sits between us. Everytime I hear someone talk about their fit bit I feel like asking, if you wear it on the arm with which you masturbate how will that be reported by the fit bit? Would it record in cold hard numbers a log of your mastubatory habit? I am not going to get a fit bit to find out. I did not ask my ex-wife this question.<br />
<br />
People choose to wear a wide variety of clothing while travelling by plane, but this is not true. Men wear what men always seem to wear, which is to say men typical underdress. It is the women who dress casual-comfortable for a flight. Sweats, yoga pants, baggy clothes. Then there is the woman who boarded a 6:15am flight on a Thursday morning wearing a tight spaghetti strap top, cutoff blue jean shorts cut way up to there, and 3 inch heels. Party on, Wayne.<br />
<br />
Mile high club? I can barely fit into this airplane bathroom. Two people can't fit in here, much less have sex in here. Maybe the only way two people can fit in here is if they are having sex, taking up less space, joined as one. But they would have to first join up outside the bathroom, and then squeeze in. I can't even tuck in my shirt without banging the walls with my elbows.<br />
<br />
I don't care if you are traveling together, on your honeymoon, even. If there are two of you on a row with three seats why would you sit next to each other? Why would you not have more space by sitting one seat apart? And neither of them are in the aisle seat. (Addendum: they did watch a movie together, and have to sit next to each other for that.)<br />
<br />
I can get by with an indifferent server in most of the service industry. At resturants or stores I can be served by a robot, by a Vulcan, and I am fine with that. As long as they do their job. But a friendly, cheerful flight attendant is awesome. A flight attendant with a neutral demeanor (or worse) can go teach their grandmother to suck eggs.<br />
<br />
It is colder on this plane than the first flight, and there is less leg room.<br />
<br />Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-60081366399426227682015-05-29T11:15:00.001-05:002016-11-23T13:53:18.735-06:00Man, Girl, and What the Witness Saw<span style="font-family: "calibri";">Someone posted the below on Facebook. Several times I
stopped myself from commenting on the post, as I did not want to be a complete
ass. Instead, I will be just a regular ass and make fun of the post here.</span><br />
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<br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Just watched a 50-something man drive up to a blonde
teenage girl to "ask directions" in a back parking lot at a mall. She
had parked as far away as possible from the store she was leaving and was
trekking across the middle of the parking lot when he pulled up to her. Really?
He had to have her help? That's so creepy and sure could've ended differently.”</span></div>
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</div>
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<br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">This post says little to nothing about the man and the
girl. This post says everything about the person who witnessed it. The comments
were supportive by declaring the situation to indeed be “creepy” and “scary.”
What I find scary is how witnessing this simple exchange brings out such fear
and paranoia.</span></div>
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<br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The post included the location, a more recently built
shopping mall, which means there is no back parking lot. Modern shopping malls
all have one big parking lot encircling the mall. Let’s just say it was a
more remote section of mall parking, if the girl was able to park so far away
that she has to trek across the middle of the parking lot to reach her car,
then that doesn’t sound at all like a back parking lot. The witness has
included “back parking lot” in the story because it adds a level of danger. The
girl was not out in the open, in a more public parking lot, for anyone to see,
the girl was in a back parking lot, just one step up from a back alley, where
we all know perverts linger, just waiting to do nasty things to unsuspecting
blonde teenage girls.</span></div>
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<br />
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">It should be pointed out that the post was made at
2:14PM. And since the witness claims to have “just watched” this exchange, then
it occurred approximately 2PM on a weekday afternoon. Bad things don’t happen
in back alleys … ummm, back parking lots … only in the middle of the night. So
I guess this one is a wash. Girls are abducted by strangers in broad daylight
all the time!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The man talked to the girl to “ask directions.” Since the
witness provides no additional information on this point then we must assume
the man did indeed ask directions. Why the quotation marks? Hmmm …</span></div>
<br />
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Excuse me, pretty blonde vulnerable defenseless naïve virgin teenage girl, can you tell me where I might find … DICK’s Sporting Goods?”</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Hello there, blonde just –asking-for-it teenage girl, how exactly can I find my way into your pants?”</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Greetings, my pretty, is there a Victoria’s Secret in this mall? I need to buy some clean, fresh, pure, white panties for my daughters who I assure you I am keeping save from the world by home schooling them and never letting them out of my sight or the sight of an approved guardian, but I do like to see them wearing clean, fresh, pure, white panties … what kind of panties are you wearing?</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">“Good afternoon, blonde teenage girl, I am going to pretend to ask you directions so I may ogle you, and maybe stuff you into my trunk if it weren’t 2PM in the afternoon, and we weren’t in the middle of this back parking lot, and that lady over there wasn’t witnessing this entire exchange."</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">How did it actually end? We must assume the man asked directions, and then the girl provided directions, and then the man drove off, and the girl proceeded to her car.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">How could it have “ended differently?”</span></div>
<ol>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">She doesn’t give him directions.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">She gives him directions but they suck and he still can’t find what he is looking for.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The girl pulls out a gun and shoots the man dead while he is sitting in his car which is still in gear and his foot falls off the brake pedal and the car idles or creeps slowly across the back parking lot like a wayward shopping cart and hits another car.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">A man is hiding in the back of the girl’s car and abducts her.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "calibri";">The witness feels concern during this exchange but the man drives off and the girl walks safely to her car and the witness realizes this was just another regular everyday exchange between two strangers into which she injected her own fear and paranoia which she feels motivated to inject into her own daughter (who was with her at the time) by using this as another teaching moment but then realizes the hundreds of previous teaching moments should suffice where she instructed her daughter that strange men are the most dangerous thing in the world to girls and indeed men are very dangerous to girls but they usually aren’t strangers they are usually family or a friend or a known authority figure and she decides to let the concern pass and not put more of her fears into her daughter because her daughter is probably full-up anyway and the witness never even thinks about relaying the story nor posting it on facebook.</span> </div>
</li>
</ol>
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<br /></div>
</div>
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</div>
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</div>
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</div>
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</div>
</div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-12779201059109962462015-04-02T15:55:00.000-05:002015-04-02T15:55:01.140-05:007 Minute Footsteps<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Life proceeds in 7 minute increments. Does everything you
do take 7 Minutes? Of course not. Don't be silly. Think of the 7 minutes as
footsteps; mental, intellectual, emotional footsteps. You are moving in a
direction, one step at a time. Will you continue doing whatever you are doing?
Or change directions?</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Focus. Attention. Engagement. Think of these as making up
the footsteps. Mentally. Intellectually. Emotionally. Every "7
minutes" you unconsciously decide if your focus will stay or shift, if
your attention will hold or falter, if your engagement will remain or wane.
Every "7 minutes."</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Here is the point. The most important moment in your
life, ever, is your current 7 Minutes. Doesn’t matter what you are doing.
Sleeping, driving, sitting on the toilet. Your current moment is the only
moment that matters. Sure, remember past moments. Sure, plan future moments. Do
not become preoccupied with either. No matter what you are you doing, what you
are doing is the most important moment of your life.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Stay focused on your current 7 Minutes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Pay attention to your current 7 Minutes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Remain engaged with your current 7 Minutes. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-63329446067065265972015-03-25T14:50:00.000-05:002015-03-25T14:50:15.394-05:00Love is Simple, the Rest is Tough
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">While I was working on my masters in Liberal Arts I took
a theater class. The professor was great. Not just because of his experience,
knowledge and passion about theater, but also because of the tangents he would
take during class. One time he went off on love. His main argument was that no
one can define love (certainly not a new idea). He spoke of how we “love”
everything. I love those shoes. I love that movie. I love this restaurant. I
love that TV show. I love this weather. I love that song. I love you. His
complaint here is that we adulterate love by applying it to everything we like.
He pointed out that any parent who ever abused or even murdered their own
children contended all along they loved their children. Many may scoff at that
notion, but who are we say whether they did, or did not? Just because we think
the outcome is appalling?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I say this to you. We know exactly what love is. Anyone
who says they love shoes or a movie knows exactly what love is. Love is not some
complex unexplainable concept that can differ from person to person. Love is
one simple thing: it means you care. That’s it. You care. And not necessarily
in a good way, as evidenced by those who hurt the ones they love.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I care about those shoes. I care about that movie. I care
about this restaurant. I care about that TV show. I care about this weather. I
care about that song. I care about you.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Love is most definitely not all you need (with apologizes
to John Lennon). Loving, or caring, is important, but it is only the start. In
tandem with love is devotion, which results in committed, persistent behavior
(of whatever nature). Love and devotion combine to form the foundation of
behavior. Think of love as the spark and devotion as the fuel, and together you
have the flame (how is that for cheesy analogies!!). Caring and devotion will
motivate you to act, but your behavior might be good or bad. Other factors
determine whether your behavior is actually loving and caring, and not mean and
hurtful.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Love (to care for) and devotion are the foundation.
Together they spur you into action. But what action? Will your behavior lift
someone up, or break them down? Now we get to character. Your character
determines whether your “flame” will be warm and nurturing, or burning and
destructive. You can find combinations of the following in all people, and they
determine how they use their love and devotion, and to what end. Selfish or
unselfish? Kind or mean? Hold a grudge or forgiving? Compassionate or cruel?
Generous or spiteful? Open-minded or closed-minded?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">To hear someone say they love you is uplifting. But of
more importance is their behavior toward you. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-30381871574867008462015-01-31T15:29:00.001-06:002015-01-31T15:29:50.405-06:00Ice Ice, Baby<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Icebreakers. For several years now I have been responsible for icebreakers at department meetings. I am the icebreaker king! Course, we all know each other so these aren’t getting to know you icebreakers, more like lighten the mood icebreakers. I decided it was time to act on an idea of mine to play the game Don't Break the Ice as an icebreaker. Clever, right? You know it! Around 30 people at a meeting. Say 8 tables with 4 people at each, so I needed 8 games. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxBVevPKmgUJbkzrevoguCh5d4Sr4HtdVYSV_pEvj7vAIurC2lD7lz52i2GQkNVMsp-IVm83rl-WB5qWe9PPwhgLto3RaqTSeCIl0vsuz5KFoJaWWu5gDNtjtsvBBOMwwFG_ba8nr_zXxe/s1600/iceice.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxBVevPKmgUJbkzrevoguCh5d4Sr4HtdVYSV_pEvj7vAIurC2lD7lz52i2GQkNVMsp-IVm83rl-WB5qWe9PPwhgLto3RaqTSeCIl0vsuz5KFoJaWWu5gDNtjtsvBBOMwwFG_ba8nr_zXxe/s1600/iceice.jpg" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was at Target near my house and took a look at the games and found 2 Don't Break the Ice. Cool. I am thinking hit 3 or 4 more Targets or Wal-marts and I got my 8 games. Do you think you know where this going?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">T</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">here are two Wal-marts close to me, to the north and south. I visit both. Zero games. I head down to the Target at Parker and the Tollway. Nothing. I scoot over to the Wal-mart at Coit and Bush Tollway. Nada. Do you think you know where this going?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">At about this time you may be thinking to yourself, "Damn, Fro, just order the things online. This is the 21st friggin' century, dude!" You are entirely missing the point. It is about the quest! The task! The adventure! I am kicking it old school! I am not even going to let my fingers do the walking! What is your quest? I seek 8 Don’t Break the Ice games, gatekeeper!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Monday. A day off. Martin Luther King, Jr Day and all. Let the quest continue!!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I head up to the Target at El Dorado. Nothing. As I drive out to the Target at Custer and 121 I am beginning to entertain the notion that I can’t find 8 games locally. In which case I will certainly have to order the damn things, which pushes playing the games to a later meeting. If this Target is dry, I say, then I just might give up. A quitter. Quest failure. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The Target at Custer and 121 had 1 game! I am emboldened! I am energized! The quest continues! Targets and Wal-Marts dot Central Expressway north of the Bush Tollway. It can be done!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The very next Target, in North Allen, has 2 games. YES! And there is a Toys R Us in the area (I thought they were closing down stores.) However, the Toys R Us does not open for 25 minutes. I am not waiting around. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I go too far down Central Expressway and decide to cut over to the Target in the middle of Richardson. Along the way I pass a Wal-Mart. Nothing. And the Richardson Target? Nothing. I work my way back up Central, the Target at Parker. Score 1 game!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I keep heading back up Central, back towards the Toys R Us that opens at 10. I hit the Wal-Mart at Spring Creek. Zilch. I hit a Target in south Allen. Zilch. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Whatever Toys R Us has or doesn’t have, I am heading home afterward. The son and I are going to the movies at noon. I enter the Toys R Us. The game section is easy to find at Wal-Mart and Target. Just one aisle, or along one wall. But upon entering Toys R Us I know that things could be spread out. I do the unthinkable. I ask for help. The woman takes me to a section, similar games are there, the games I have found at each of the other stores (Cooties, Ants in the Pants, Don’t Spill the Beans). THERE IS NO DON’T BREAK THE ICE!! What? Toys R Us, you have let me down!!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Wait, she says. There will be more over here, she says. What? I say. Around the corner and down another aisle there are at least 10 Cooties games. The woman pulls them out, and hidden behind them are Don’t Break the Ice!. I grab two.</span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Final count:</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">
<ul>
<li>7 Targets yielded 6 games</li>
<li>1 Toys R Us yielded 2 games</li>
<li>5 Wal-marts yielded zero game. F you, Wal-mart!</li>
<li>Mission accomplished. Quest complete. Level up. </li>
</ul>
<div>
</div>
</span><br /></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span>Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-78989580801478410862015-01-18T15:38:00.000-06:002015-01-18T15:38:56.709-06:00First and Second Tattoo
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Within 10 minutes of coming up with the idea for these
two tattoos I wrote exactly the following:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijEcF5jGH_LKEOq9E9r5D1FQy7lnGvC35D3BVvbqsU2GiXEODYPIXvt4qQKjGjiGEpNTBu0pTQvwdSw2ZCOnfsBZ0MRy5lu0FWoXk_RcDVv-Ns991WzV5P3RCtC7aCB46b-7PbzSsQ6VJE/s1600/tats1and2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijEcF5jGH_LKEOq9E9r5D1FQy7lnGvC35D3BVvbqsU2GiXEODYPIXvt4qQKjGjiGEpNTBu0pTQvwdSw2ZCOnfsBZ0MRy5lu0FWoXk_RcDVv-Ns991WzV5P3RCtC7aCB46b-7PbzSsQ6VJE/s1600/tats1and2.jpg" height="320" width="310" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">On my right forearm I would get the knot, and on the left
forearm the same rope but just straight. Ultimately they are about acceptance.
Accepting myself for who and what I am, and accepting others for whoever and
whatever they may be. In a sense the knot is No Agenda, and the straight rope
is No Timeline. The knot is how we often perceive life: a knot that has to be
tied or untied in order to feel ecstasy, or joy, bliss, or contentment. We make
our lives complex and complicated. But experiencing ecstasy, joy, bliss, and
contentment is simple, as long as you don't judge yourself or judge others.
Just be. Live in the now. Accept. Don't tie knots, be the straight rope.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Five months ago in August I adopted the mantra No Agenda,
No Timeline. There was a discussion involving expectations and since I believe
anger, frustration, and depression derive from the difference between
expectations and reality, I try not to have expectations. To convey this during
the discussion I said no agenda, no timeline. Don't force it. Don't box
yourself in with preconceived notions. Go with the dynamic. Let all of your
relationships grow out of sharing over time. No Age</span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">nda, No Timeline.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">In September I read a book called The Four Agreements. As
a result I created four agreements with myself. Two of them are extensions of
No Agenda, No Timeline.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<ul>
<li><div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I will recognize who someone is, what place they have in my life, accept them and their role in my life, treat them accordingly, and know that they might change and if so I will change my attitude with them.</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I will make peace with who and what I am, know and understand what motivates me, and live within those motivations.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">For several months I worked to ingrain these concepts
into my life and into my being. It wasn't quick and easy. I had to keep reminding
myself, keep working at it. I am still working at it, and still reminding
myself. I probably always will be. For several months these concepts percolated.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoY0rXX2bMgyRqP1emovW1A-r1DxQezo8Fi8bWIXpPSdfQGM1qqbilfGcnPG8YRumDPg5ThXrU3NBm5e2hI0i2l6RpEHJi7QWp_e0OE1W1isAK-5etXWHy8y8WldcRbKU9JNik07gv3YzU/s1600/EmotionKnots.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoY0rXX2bMgyRqP1emovW1A-r1DxQezo8Fi8bWIXpPSdfQGM1qqbilfGcnPG8YRumDPg5ThXrU3NBm5e2hI0i2l6RpEHJi7QWp_e0OE1W1isAK-5etXWHy8y8WldcRbKU9JNik07gv3YzU/s1600/EmotionKnots.jpg" height="212" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A few weeks ago I was reading an article and this picture
of knots was used as a graphic. The article was not about the knots, they were
not even mentioned. I searched for the source of the image. Was it from a
philosophy? Used to explain some concept or lesson? Seems to simply have been
created by a graphic artist.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">One week ago I was lying in bed on a lazy Sunday morning,
staring at the ceiling and contemplating life. All of these elements swirled
together in my thoughts and the idea of the straight, untied rope in
juxtaposition to the knotted rope floated into my mind. Symbols for my first and
second tattoos. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">We make knots in ourselves and our lives. We erroneously
believe we have to untie knots in order to experience joy or contentment.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There is no knot.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-25271893887409019492014-10-24T16:46:00.000-05:002014-10-24T16:46:34.067-05:00Give, Essentially<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I was reading an article, a movie review actually, but
that is not important right now. The writer was making reference to character
motivation and said that everyone was seeking the emotional essentials: love,
sex, conversation, and compliments. This is an interesting short list.
Conversation and compliments?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My first thought was Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. Let's
dust that off, shall we?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Physiological needs (Breathing, food, water, sex, sleep, homeostasis, excretion)</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Safety needs (Security of body, of employment, of resources, of morality, of the family, of health, or property)</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Love and belonging (Friendship, family, sexual intimacy)</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Esteem (Self-esteem, confidence, achievement, respect of others, respect by others)</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Self-actualization (Morality, creativity, spontaneity, problem solving, lack of prejudice, acceptance of facts)</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Emotional essentials are more advanced, so we can skip
the first two, physiological and safety. The assumption being that if these
first two are not being met then you have no time to ponder your lack of the
emotional essentials. Convenient that sex appears as both a base physiological
essential and part of the higher need to feel loved and wanted. I guess the
point might be that masturbation could satisfy the base physiological need for
sex, but not the higher need of feeling love and belonging. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">We also can skip self-actualization since that is an
intellectual essential, and not emotional. But what about esteem? Is esteem an
emotional essential? I say no. Esteem is an individual essential.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Comparing love, sex, conversation, and compliments to
love and belonging (friendship, family, sexual intimacy), I would have to admit
that the writer was spot on. Those are the emotional essentials form Maslow's
Hierarchy of Needs.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I did some searching. You know, Google. And from a
marriage/relationship site I get the following emotional essentials:</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Affection</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sexual Fulfillment</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Conversation</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Recreational Companionship</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Honesty and Openness</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Physical Attractiveness</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Financial Support</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Domestic Support</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Family Commitment</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Admiration</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Straight off we can match the following with the writer's
short list: affection, sexual fulfillment, conversation, and admiration. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Recreational Companionship? Someone to do stuff with,
right? Emotional? No. Essential? For some, maybe, but not for all, so not
essential.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Honesty and Openness? Emotional? No. Essential? For a
relationship, yes.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Physical Attractiveness? Whose? The person? Or people in
that person's world?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Financial and Domestic Support? At best, these tie back
to the base physiological needs. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Family Commitment? What does this even mean? Just having
a family? Sacrificing for the good of the family? Who gets to decide what is
good?</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">So. That marriage/relationship site has some advice it
wants to convey and included them in a list of emotional essentials. But they
do have items that match the writer's short list: love, sex, conversation, and
compliments</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">On a psychology-type site I found the following top ten
emotional essentials. One quick look and they already seem more genuine than
the list from the marriage site. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Security — safe territory and an environment which allows us to develop fully</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Attention (to give and receive it) — a form of nutrition</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sense of autonomy and control — having volition to make responsible choices</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Being emotionally connected to others</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Feeling part of a wider community</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Friendship, intimacy — to know that at least one other person accepts us totally for who we are, “warts ‘n’ all”</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Privacy — opportunity to reflect and consolidate experience</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sense of status within social groupings</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sense of competence and achievement</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Having meaning and purpose — which comes from being stretched in what we do and think.</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">These are the ones that qualify as an emotional need:
attention, connected to others, friendship, and intimacy.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Okay. We now have an expanded list of emotional needs:</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">love</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">sexual fulfillment</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">conversation</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">compliments</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">affection</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">admiration</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">attention</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">connected to others</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">friendship</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">intimacy</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Although these are considered "needs" I submit
to you, I challenge you, that they are actually what you should be giving to
others, as appropriate for each relationship, and to your romantic partner,
give ALL of them. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-11394899183263220532014-10-06T14:44:00.000-05:002014-10-06T14:44:24.356-05:00Heart and Seek<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I used to think "my type" of woman wears her
heart on her sleeve. In part because I am not aggressive and it seemed like a
good yin/yang kinda thing. I confess I was once not very expressive and so a
woman with her heart on her sleeve made it easier on me. Having relationships
with only heart-on-their-sleeves women has allowed me to be lazy and kept me
from learning much needed relationship skills.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Being in a relationship with a woman who wears her heart
on her sleeve is no walk in the park. You learn to read emotional queues that
lead up to emotional outbursts, both good and bad. Body language, facial
expressions, tone of voice. You more easily recognize subtle emotional signs,
because quite frankly you've become conditioned, like Pavlov’s dog! This is a
valuable skill when you find yourself in a relationship with a more reserved
woman. Her emotional expressions will be more subtle, and you will be able to
read them.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If like me you tend towards women who wear their hearts
on their sleeves, then you may at first find yourself befuddled by a woman who
does not. This is where the lazy part comes in. Expressive women do most of the
relationship work for you. From the get-go they share, share, share. You know what
they are thinking and what they are feeling. You know what they like and don't
like. This might put you on the defensive, to slow things down. You take that same
approach with a less expressive woman and you will become two ends that never
meet. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If you are unable to adapt, if you find yourself courting
a less expressive woman and you cannot overcome your relationship laziness,
then you are handicapped and limited. Depriving yourself of being more
well-rounded and complete. Depriving yourself of becoming a fully actualized emotional
being, able to be the yin and/or the yang, as needed. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When you are with a woman who wears her heart on her
sleeve then you push back in order to find some common ground in the middle.
When you are with a less expressive woman then you pull in order to bring her into
the middle common ground. Just don't pull too hard, and you know, be patient.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Here is my thinking on courting a less expressive woman.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<ul>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Patience: things move more slowly. Wait.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Prompting: you are going to have start conversations. You will have to lead at times.</span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Sharing as a prompt: do not always just ask questions, this becomes an interrogation. Share and express yourself, and give her the opportunity to reciprocate. </span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Know what you want: you cannot be fickle and inconsistent. </span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Determination: prompting and sharing may not result in good communication. Stick with it. </span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Acceptance: you are operating from your expectations, but the end result will be different. </span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Be vulnerable: the risk is worth it. Put yourself out there. </span></div>
</li>
<li><div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Give her some space: show interest without being demanding.</span></div>
</li>
</ul>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">No agenda. No timeline. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><div>
</div>
<br />
</div>
</div>
</div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-20163774238870950572014-10-02T14:16:00.001-05:002014-10-06T10:03:47.107-05:00Share. Relate. Connect.“We're a pack of strays, don't you get it?” So says Steve Zissou himself in the movie The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou. Wes Anderson movies are routinely populated with strays and misfits. And in every instance they seek the same thing: connection. This is no less true for the three brothers in The Darjeerling Limited. Francis, Jack, and Peter reunite a year after the death of their father, and they seek connection with each other and their parents, including the dead one.<br />
<br />
Then end result of this post is that I will talk about one component of my relationship philosophy by sharing what I once used to include in my online dating profiles (back when I was participating), which is: Share. Relate Connect.<br />
<br />
How have I arrived at this post? Let’s take a look.<br />
<br />
I was watching The Darjeerling Limited. The three brothers seek to re-connect, or perhaps to truly connect for the first time. Their parents are remote and distant, even when they are physically near (I am jumping to conclusions on the father). This reminded me in some ways of my own family, which made me sad.<br />
<br />
I thought, “I am going to breakdown this movie, find all the themes related to connection and blog something.” But what I wrote was dry and impersonal. Then there were several iterations, none of which felt satisfactory. Contrast and compare different Wes Anderson movies. Get into my family history. Reveal to much nitty-gritty of my own history.<br />
<br />
After watching the movie The Skeleton Twins with my son I was reminded of something I have previously told my kids (numerous times, I thought), and hoped he would remember. He did not. I asked, “if you have to define in one word what “relationship” means, what word would you choose?” The answer is: Sharing.<br />
<br />
Then I watched Fantastic Mr. Fox, which does not follow the common themes of most Wes Anderson movies. But, as in just about any movie or story ever, there are elements of connection. But it got me thinking about it in a more general way. Finally, I was driving to work and I thought about the old online dating tagline: Share. Relate. Connect.<br />
<br />
A relationship is simply sharing. You share your time, share your thoughts, share your feelings, and in a romantic relationship you share your body, too. Relationships begin and continue to thrive because both participants share. Relationships fail simply because one, or both, cease to share.<br />
<br />
The crux of any lasting relationship is shared experiences. You can share information and feelings all you want, but true meaning derives from spending time together and doing things together. And so, at some point in the past while mulling over what to put into an online dating profile I thought up: Share. Relate. Connect.<br />
<br />
Share yourself and do things together. <br />
Relate to what the other shares and does. <br />
Connect because you both enjoy.<br />
<br />
So, let us return to the beginning. The Darjeerling Limited. As the brothers reunite they agree to go on a spiritual journey together, to accompany their train ride across India. Yet, they continue to keep secrets, and to play one brother off the other. They are not sharing. They continue on together, doing activities together. The secrets are exposed. They settle conflicts and disagreements. They stick together. Through mutual hardships and experiences the brothers finally begin to share. They relate. They connect. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-70737945631484307342014-09-05T15:35:00.000-05:002014-09-05T16:44:37.388-05:00Let’s Get Naked<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Over the past several months I have spoken to four different people who profess a propensity for being naked around their home. Doing what they normally do, just naked. Oh really? So. I decided to check it out. An experiment. Some exploration. Hey! I like to try to new things! Test and expand my boundaries. I spent some evenings naked at my house. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong><u>First Thought</u></strong><br />What if the sound of the garage door announces an unexpected visit from one of my kids? Am I to sprint upstairs to cover my birthday suit? What if someone knocks on the door? Am I to hide quietly until they leave? No, on both counts. I kept shorts and a shirt downstairs and at the ready for any needed cover up. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong><u>Second Thought</u></strong><br />Do I sit on the furniture? If I told you I sit on my couch naked all the time are you going to want to sit on my couch? I set down a towel, for your peace of mind. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong><u>Conclusions:</u></strong><br />Generally, I like being naked. I think it has increased my body awareness and acceptance. Most people only see themselves naked in the mirror, if at all! Catching my nakedness in my peripheral vision did take some getting used to – like when I was reading a book and could see my naked self stretched out beneath the book. But a few minutes later I didn’t even notice. I see my body and I say, “this is my body as it is today and I accept it.”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am not much for just sitting around naked. Reading a book. Watching TV or a movie. On the computer. In those instances I am indifferent to being naked.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">However, I rather enjoyed doing household chores naked. Being active naked. Cleaning the dishes and kitchen. Vacuum. Dust. Clean the bathrooms. Laundry. You may not like this image, but squatting naked was particularly enjoyable. Really. I am totally serious. Putting pans in that lower cabinet, for example, or picking things up off the floor. Squatting naked! It was very liberating to be loose and free, and invigorating to get a bit of fresh air to parts of the body that don’t normally get much fresh air.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">And don’t forget naked yoga. Yeah, I did not some naked yoga poses in the privacy of my own home. All sorts of naked squats and legs in the air and good airflow! </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Is this my new thing? Not really. Am I now a card carrying nudist? Certainly not. But if I take a bit longer to answer the door it just may be because I am slipping on some shorts and a shirt, for your peace of mind. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span><br /></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-11476455553494546622014-08-01T15:06:00.000-05:002014-08-01T15:06:38.314-05:00Dating Stories
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I am not much of a dater. I can go months or even years
without going on a date. William Faulkner and I have something in common, we
both like to say that a thing cannot exist unless there is also a not-thing. A
thing is defined by what contradicts it. William says it over the course of
many books. I just kinda say it. If I am going to be a non-dater, then I am
going to have to define that through brief periods of dating. Thus … dating
stories.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">It begins at a bar. On a Tuesday night. About six weeks
ago.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I arrive at the bar and must make a monumental decision:
where to sit. Where you choose to sit can change your life, or not. The
opposite side was empty but I decided to forego that and I sat directly next to
a couple. Girl next to me, her date on the other side. I say her date because
with very little eavesdropping it was clear they were on a first date, based on
the questions he was asking her. They commented on the food I ordered. So that
opened up some intermittent conversation. Next step was whenever he went to the
restroom I would chat her up. Good banter. Her purse was hanging between us on
a hook under the bar. I wrote my cell number on a business card, along with a
joke to remind her who I was, and slipped it into her purse. And as they were
leaving I told her about my card and she responded that maybe something good
would come out of the night. </span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As I was sitting next to Business Card Girl and her date,
a woman entered the bar and sat on the opposite side. She was wearing a sleek
black dress, that is to say, overdressed for this bar, especially sitting
alone, which she did until Business Card Girl left, and I went over and sat
next to her. She had just come from a first date that had gone poorly. We got
along well.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The next day I received a text from Business Card Girl
and she and I scheduled a date. I also had a date with Black Dress Girl.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Black Dress Girl and I met at a wine bar. Business Card
Girl and I met at a regular bar. Black Dress Girl and I moved to another bar.
Business Card Girl and I ordered another beer. Got along great with both, but
otherwise nothing remarkable. Black Dress Girl was more aggressive. Business
Card Girl had prettier eyes.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The weekend in which my dating overflowith enters Yoga
Girl. Know her from yoga but didn’t really meet her at yoga. She indirectly
expressed interest in me. I messaged her, then we started texting, then we
agreed to meet for a drink. She only had an hour before she had to pick up her
daughter, but we hit it off well and scheduled a second, real date. The real
date went even better, and I even loaned her season 1 of Game of Thrones (which
actually belongs to my ex-wife, my kids brought the DVDs over years ago, and I
still have it. Well, not at the moment.)</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There I was. Three women. Previously, if I had such
options I have always felt compelled to choose early. I have never allowed
myself to just date. I made a conscious decision to force myself to not choose.
Dude, go out a few times with each!</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Business Card Girl went out of town, during which we
texted some, then it dissipated. Did not see her again. Just wasn't that
motivated.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Black Dress Girl remained aggressive and so things
labored on longer with her. It was fickle and kinda dramatic. We saw each other
four more times. But I am not motivated enough, and her aggressiveness only
goes so far. Think we are done. But it wouldn't surprise me if she contacts me
again.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Yoga Girl I liked the most. Just a few days after our
real date she said she was just too busy to date. Demanding career. Active kids
who required driving around. Family and friends. Did I believe her? Was I just
getting the brush off? I told her to keep Game of Thrones. She could just
return it one day when see each other at yoga. Weeks later she said she is
ready to return the DVD’s but that she had not had time to watch any episodes.
To which I replied I guess I could believe she actually was too busy to date!</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">After all that, but with Black Dress Girl still
lingering, I met someone from Tinder. Whirlwind Girl. For about 10 days it was
rocking and rolling. Lots of texting, which she always ended with “txt me
whenever.” We meet for lunch. We plan a date. She meets a friend for lunch and
casually says I can join if I want. I drive across town and crash lunch. We go
out more. She says she wants to take it slow, slow, very slow (She means no
sex. Just a hug, thank you. Otherwise it seemed to be going fast, fast, very
fast). Fine with me, for now anyway. But still a whirlwind of activity with
Whirlwind Girl. An established trend of heavy texting. And then it nearly
stops. Maybe because she is out of town on business? Then it totally stops
after her return. She had said she likes her space. She had said she is
independent and values her alone time. All of that is fine with me, but if that
means on and off, whirlwind and no wind. Then I am out, and it appears she is
out as well.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is how my dating life has been for 12 years. Nothing
goes beyond a few dates. Either I am not interested, or they are not
interested. Most times it just fades. Sometimes I say no thanks, and other
times they no thanks.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I could go months without a date. I might meet someone
tonight. Or in-between tonight and months. Or maybe never again.</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-9205405732558272682014-07-30T16:22:00.000-05:002014-09-03T22:24:51.611-05:00Eureka!<br />
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Back in my 20's I attended an AA meeting (court
mandated). Not sure if they all were college students but they were of that
age. They were going on and on about success. I could only surmise the pressure
to succeed is ultimately why they were at an AA meeting.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Success is a label placed onto you by others. That was my
thought back then, comment withheld, and it is my thought now, comment being
voiced.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">That is to say, you cannot control whether or not you are
a success. This is why we are always clamoring for attention. Social media,
blogs, activists, write a book, make the news, be on TV, go viral, Facebook
friends and likes and attention. You can't just live your life, someone has to
notice you living your life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How much attention you desire depends on whose
recognition you need so you can feel as though your life is validated. Maybe
you simply need one or a few people to notice. Perhaps a larger but still small
circle of friends and colleagues. You might get by with wide recognition within
the world of your profession, or chosen activities. Or you may require broad
public attention (i.e. from strangers), your 15 minutes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Attention is not enough. You are not guaranteed success.
You may achieve only notoriety. So you attempt to control the message, control the
information. You must be seen in a good light! All of us may not be running for
office, but all of us are playing politics.</span><br />
</div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Is it truly possible to be yourself, and not sellout, and
toil away in obscurity and still be a success? Of course not! Because success
is a label placed onto you by others.</span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-36611622809915748072014-05-23T10:54:00.000-05:002014-09-03T22:18:25.156-05:00Under The Skin (a movie)<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Let's just get this outta the way. Yes, in the movie
Under The Skin you get to see Scarlett Johansson naked. Dark hair. A bit
heavier than she appears in Captain America. She looks awesome. Let's move on.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;">Apparently Scarlett's character's name is Laura, but I
don't recall it ever being muttered, but the end credits say so. Laura is not
from Earth, and her job is to lure men to a rundown abandoned house so their
innards can be harvested. And when I say innards, I mean all that is left is
their skins, like a molted reptile. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is the first "under the skin," and it is
very literal. The aliens value all that is under the skin of humans. I assume
not just men, it's just easier to lure men than women.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The more Laura is among humans, the more outer differences
she observes and then the more inner difference she becomes aware of. She
begins to see humans for more than something to be harvested.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Her change in attitude culminates when she encounters a
disfigured man. Many humans would find him revolting or make fun of him or
simply shun him. Accepting his disfigured face (or perhaps not even recognizing
it as disfigured) allows Laura to appreciate what is figuratively "under
the skin" of humans. She does lure him to the alien trap, but then
sets him free. And Laura begins to wander, no longer harvesting humans.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Laura may be adept at luring men to their doom, but she
does not understand how to live amongst humans. A good Samaritan helps her out.
However, she offers no conversation or details about herself and thus he cannot
see "under her skin." He is polite and helpful but still tries to
have sex with her. But she does not understand sex. She is almost robot-like as
he attempts to seduce her, but not only is she mentally and emotionally
incapable of sex, also physically. It goes nowhere and she leaves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Laura makes her way to a secluded wood, where walking a
path she encounters a man who gives her tips on the area. She falls asleep in a
shelter and the man shows up and begins to assault her. She escapes into the
wood. He catches her and attempts to rape her. But then her human body suit
rips and he can see part of the alien beneath. He douses her with petrol and
sets her on fire.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Story progression: Aliens value what is the under the
skin of humans and kill them. One alien discovers what is truly under the skin
of humans and can no longer kill them. Men see only a beautiful woman and care
not what is under the skin, they just want to have sex with her. A man
discovers the alien under the skin and kills the alien. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">The skin, our outer selves, this is the packaging. And it
is important. Your packaging reveals your lifestyle, it reflects the decisions,
choices and events in your life. What is under the skin, this is also
important. It reflects your motivations, and the thoughts and feelings you have
about the decisions, choices, and events in your life. </span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-55571741266063860002014-04-10T16:25:00.002-05:002014-04-10T16:28:16.442-05:00Love Me Tinder<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I decided to give Tinder a try. Have you not heard of
Tinder? It is a dating app. You know, on your phone. So simple. Profiles
are comprised of a few pics and a very short profile. You set your preferences
(be liberal, baby) and then you view profiles. Simply mark a profile as like or
don’t like. Yes or no. Piece of cake! On some dating sites you can message
whoever the hell the you want. Other sites tell you who you can message. On
Tinder, if you say yes and she says yes then you get to trade messages
Easy!<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Here is how I work it on Tinder. I view a pic. I ask
myself, “if this pic were across the room at a social event would I want to
talk to her?” My only expectation is to meet people. What better measure than
if I would walk across a room to speak to her? Okay then. I load the App. I set
my preferences, for distance and age. I see profiles. I start judging. One day
later I get a hit. Exciting! Do you know what this means? This means I
superficially judged a woman as “like” and she superficially judged me as
“like.” Awesome!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Let me share with you the exchange. As a point of
reference I am 48, she is 51. (are you judging already? Surely you would if I
provided pictures). She sends the first message. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Her: <em>Hello … Handsome …</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I am thinking: <em>What is up with the dot, dot, dots?
Let me think about it … you are handsome.</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How I should respond: <em>Hey there, beautiful</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I actually send: <em>Here I am trying to think of
some clever first message, and you break the ice. What is up with you?<o:p></o:p></em></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Her: <em>So … What’s your story?</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I am thinking: <em>more dot, dot, dots? Dramatic pause?
Hesitancy?</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How I should respond: <em>Just a regular guy trying to find a
woman to please.</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I actually send: <em>Once upon a time. Yesterday, even ,
I was on central, southbound and exited at Northwest highway, heading west. So,
I was on that cloverleaf ramp, pulling some G’s and I heard a brief rattle, and
a screw fell from beneath the dash and hit my left foot. The end.</em> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Her (3 hours later): <em>Excellent Story …… U win …</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I am thinking: <em>that is seven dots in row!</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">How I should respond: <em>What is my prize?</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What I actually send: <em>That … is a true story … what is
your story?<o:p></o:p></em></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">No more messages from her. How am I doing at this Tinder
thing?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Tinder is the most honest and true dating app/site out
there. Throughout the history of humanity how have people met? They see each
other and decide to talk. At school, a party, a club, at church, wherever. You
see someone and you decide you would like to meet that person. What do you know
about them? Nothing. Just what you see.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What sucks about the other dating
sites/apps? All the frigging details! All that frigging information! We think
it helps but the exact opposite is true, it just gets in the way. First, it
creates false intimacy; you think you know someone but you really have no idea.
You fill in the blanks with your imagination, and if you do meet then your
expectations rarely will be met. Second, it promotes laziness; we want to like
someone before we meet them. Paradoxically, instead of looking for things we
might like about a person, we look for what we don’t like. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I have gotten four matches so far. The one above. One
whom I inadvertently swiped right (for like), and guess I will message some
anyway. A third who has not yet responded to my message, perhaps she
inadvertently swiped me to the right! And, of course, a spammer; where
she/he/it asked me to contact her on KIK. Wait. Just added two more, and each
is a real person.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Feel the love on Tinder. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-90153772094529615472014-03-28T11:48:00.000-05:002014-09-03T22:32:27.734-05:0050 Things<span style="font-family: Calibri;">After reading <a href="http://wallstreetinsanity.com/50-things-every-man-should-realize/" target="_blank">50 Things Every Man Should Realize on Wall Street Sanity</a>, </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">I would like to offer a comment on each.</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">1. If you always believe you’re the smartest guy in the
room, you’ll never learn anything.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Not if you learn humility.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">2. Figure out how you would be of value in a
post-apocalyptic society.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>How is this answer not always "learn to produce your
own food."</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">3. Learn CPR, the Heimlich and basic first aid.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Done.</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">4. Sex is best when you treat it as a competition.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This seems like shit advice. A competition with whom? I believe
this mindset leads to objectification. </strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">5. Save money. Rainy days can come out of nowhere.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>See number 6 below.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">6. Spend money. You can’t take it with you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>See number 5 above. Whatever.</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">7. Hate to break it to you, but size DOES matter.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Everybody knows this. The question is, how much?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">8. Be generous and open to criticism, especially in bed.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Only at number 8 on the list and already three references
to sex!<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">9. Your wife/girlfriend is not your mother.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>If only she would stop acting like one.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">10. A strong work ethic is a good substitute for being smart.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>I would say more important, even.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">11. Handshake agreements aren’t worth the paper they’re
printed on.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Are you a lawyer?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">12. Don’t let your friends drift away, because they will
if you let them.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>But what if they are letting me drift away?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">13. Time is your most valuable commodity. Don’t waste too
much of it.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>I believe only pessimists see time as an enemy.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">14. If you’re not happy, stop what you’re doing and do
something else. Right now.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Happiness is nothing more than a choice.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">15. Keep your bathroom clean and your bed made if you
want a woman to use either.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Don't I first have to get a woman to come over. (4th
sex reference!)</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">16. Failure sucks, but it feels way better than not
trying.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Too bad you see sex as a competition.<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">17. Always be confident. Never be cocky.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This is often in the eye of the beholder.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">18. Remember people’s names.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>But for how long?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">19. Don’t be an asshole. Seriously. Just don’t.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>You mean don’t be an asshole to you.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">20. Choose your role models carefully.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>I like what I like.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">21. Keep your mind in shape. Do a crossword. Memorize a
poem. Something like that.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Okay. I agree with this.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">22. If you can’t drive a stick, parallel park or jump-start
a car, I’m sorry, but you can’t call yourself a man.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Or? So I need to be able to do just one of these?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">23. If you’re in couples’ therapy, it’s already over.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Clearly a pessimistic and short-sited view. Depends on
why you are in therapy.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">24. If making money is you’re only goal in life, you’ll
never be happy because you’ll never have enough.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>What if my goal is to be able to buy what I want?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">25. Having a toolbox and knowing how to use what’s inside
of it is pretty damn important.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Is this another sex reference?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">26. Know how to tell a good story. If you can’t capture
people’s attention, you’re just some dude in the background.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>So ... don't be myself.</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">27. When you get wasted, you’re not as funny as you think
you are.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Yeah, too bad I am wasted and don't care.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">28. Do not give a single shit about what anybody thinks
of you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This invalidates most of the items on this list.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">29. Quality trumps quantity every time.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Not for commodities.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">30. Do at least 50 push-ups every day.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Is this the only exercise I need do?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">31. Gentlemen are a dying breed. Be one and you’ll stand
out.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Of course.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">32. Don’t sleep with anyone you wouldn’t buy breakfast
for the next day.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Assuming of course she accepts my bathroom and bed, such
as they may be. (5th sex reference!)</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">33. Don’t tell her you’re going to call her unless you
really are. It’s chicken-shit.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>But what if I don't like her bathroom and bed, such as
they are?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">34. A daily compliment goes a long way.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>How soon until it loses its value?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">35. You can’t change the past. Let it go.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>But I still live in it.</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">36. Prepare for the future but live in the present.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Not if I am living in the past.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">37. If this is the longest thing you’ve read all week,
that’s sad. Crack a book once in a while, idiot.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Do Craiglist's personal ads count?<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">38. If she’s has had more than three different dicks in
her ass, she’s probably not marriage material.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Her ass is more important than her vagina or mouth? (6th
sex reference!)</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">39. Own up to mistakes, even if you’re not the one who
made them. Nobody likes or respects the guy who refuses to accept any blame.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Isn't this the problem with the entire American culture,
society, business world, and political climate?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">40. Learn how to change a tire and make sure to help
anyone who can’t do it themselves.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>So, help the elderly?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">41. No one gives a shit about your religion. Whether
you’re a devout fundamentalist or a staunch atheist, keep it to yourself.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Isn't this the problem with the entire American culture,
society, business world, and political climate?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">42. Reevaluate your goals every couple of years. What you
want out of life changes constantly.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This is why some people have money as their goal.<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">43. Stop holding grudges. It accomplishes nothing.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>I get this.</strong> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">44. Control your impulses. But it’s okay to let a few get
away from you.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>There is no control, or willpower. People always do what
they want.</strong> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">45. Don’t wear your heart on your sleeve. A real man can
control his emotions.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This is more restrictive than controlling my impulses?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">46. Burning bridges is one of the stupidest things you
can do.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>What if my gut tells me different?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">47. Trust your gut, even if it’s steered you wrong in the
past.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Sounds like a good reason not to trust.<o:p></o:p></strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">48. Be honest in all your relationships. Liars suck.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>But not if I am hiding my emotions?</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">49. If you know how to play guitar, it’s much easier to
get laid.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>Then can I have an unmade bed and a dirty bathroom? (7th
sex reference!)</strong></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">50. Relax. Whatever it is, it’s not that big a deal.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><strong>This renders the list moot. So ... 1 thing every man
should realize.</strong> </span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-73928213578509314882014-03-27T20:42:00.000-05:002014-03-27T20:42:18.095-05:00I Think I Can. I Think I Can.
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">They say if you keep repeating something then you will
come to believe it. Your behavior and attitude will change. This has worked for
me before. Let’s try it again.</span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I say it because experience tells me it is true. I repeat
it to break the urge to go out. Because nothing good happens when I go out.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">When I go out I eat restaurant food, large portions of
restaurant food. When I go out I drink beer, or other libations. At my age and
metabolism this type of consumption does not do a body good. Nothing else
happens. All I do is increase my risk factors. </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Why do I go out? Why does anyone go out? For the social
interaction, to meet people. The motivation being that you will "have
fun." It seems we are ever in search of fun, especially so for the young.
Like there is some equation you solve that results in fun. </span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What do I think will <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>occur when I go out? Empirical evidence leaves no doubt.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.</span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What sort of boring homebody will I become? The same
boring homebody I already am, just without the expense and calories and
futileness of going out. </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.</span></div>
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">If I go out then nothing good will happen.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-143597241957593112014-01-27T14:10:00.000-06:002014-01-27T14:10:57.883-06:00Birth of Life (movie: Gravity)
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Life in space is impossible. So begins the movie
“Gravity.” Life may be impossible, but survival is not. Dr. Ryan Stone (played
by Sandra Bullock) does indeed survive space, and thus life is possible on the
planet surface. Her journey is birth. Her destination is mother earth. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Gravity is a space adventure, or so it would seem. A race
against time and destruction. But then Dr. Stone enters the International Space
Station, casts off her space suit, and floats into a fetal position. She is in
the womb, the first crucible of life. The second and more important crucible is
birth. She is on the move, head first toward the light. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As Dr. Stone hurtles towards the planet surface and
enters the atmosphere. A burst of light shines through the window. She has
entered into the world. Her capsule lands in water and then sinks. She
struggles to the surface and breaths in deeply, as if for the first time. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Dr. Stone crawls along the shore, she staggers to
her feet, she begins to walk, as if she were the first creature to venture from
the sea and walk on land. She is life itself. Persistent, determined,
surviving.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-66850243960662918902014-01-14T16:15:00.000-06:002014-01-14T16:15:46.880-06:00One Day. Three Movies.
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Back in the before time, when I was a teenager, VCR’s
came into their own. VCR. You know, VHS. You know, what we used before DVD’s,
which were before Blu-Ray, which will one day all disappear due to streaming.
Anyway. When VCR’s burst on the scene then your local video store came along
with it. We belonged to one where for an annual fee you could always have one
movie rented, and swap out as often as you like. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">One day it was really quiet around the house. No one was
really around. All day. With a mom and a dad and three sisters and a brother it
was a bit rare to have the house to yourself all day. I decided to see how many
videos I could rent and watch in one day. I went to that video store five times
in one day. The only title I can recall is Blood Beach.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ah, to be 17. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A few months back I shared this story with my kids, and
my son and I began to discuss the possibility of seeing three movies in the
theater in one day. This past Saturday we made it so. In one day, at the same
theater, we saw “August: Osage County,” and went almost immediately into “Lone
Survivor.” Then after dinner we saw “Her.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A note on my son, who is 17. He just doesn’t like movies,
he is into them. He is familiar with the lesser known actors, and he follows
who is writing and directing what. This in depth interest has lead him to see
movies in which he is, by far, the youngest person in the audience. And
certainly the youngest male. Movies like “Nebraska” and “Philomenia.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">My son says “August: Osage County” is about mothers. I
agree. In this case, toxic mothers. As you can very well gather if you have
seen any commercials, Violet Weston (played by Meryl Streep) is indeed very
toxic. And she is not the only one. As much I enjoyed the movie, it hasn’t
really stuck with me; I have not had any lingering thoughts. Except, perhaps,
to not underestimate the damage of emotionally abusive parents. Seemed more
like a case study of what we already know. Parents who continually put you down
will mess you up. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">At one point the matriarch Violet Weston went on a rant
about how women have to be young in order to be attractive. Men, she said, can
remain attractive with age, but woman cannot. This is pretty much what I said
here <a href="http://thoughtsdriving.blogspot.com/2013/02/older-women-my-own-age.html">http://thoughtsdriving.blogspot.com/2013/02/older-women-my-own-age.html<o:p></o:p></a></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">There are not many surprises in “Lone Survivor.” However,
it did generate feelings of guilt. Americans have gone to Iraq and Afghanistan
to fight and die, and I am sitting in relative comfort, eating popcorn. But
then, that would seem to be the point of the movie, given the over-dramatized
deaths. These men are indeed courageous, strong, brave, and loyal. I cannot
begin to understand what any of them and their families have been through. But
I now kinda feel like the movie stuck me with a knife and twisted. Is that the
movie? Or is that me?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Four people walked out during the movie “Her.” It can
only be because of the sexual content. There were no visually graphic sex
scenes, but there were some verbally graphic sex scenes, a la phone sex. I
rather enjoyed the blunt and honest way in which sex was handled. Audiences are
used to seeing sex scenes, but in making it verbal, I think it disturbs some
people’s comfort zone. This movie is a not so subtle jab at today’s world of social
media, online dating, sexting, and immersion into our technical devices. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">We could talk about Theodore’s lack of presence or
apparent fear of intimacy in his marriage. We could talk about futuristic
online dating that is all verbal, with immediate phone-sex hookups. We could
talk about the blind date who is still quick to jump in the sack but not so
quick to do so without a promised commitment in advance. We could talk about
the woman who wanted to be the sexual surrogate stand-in for the artificially intelligent
operating system.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We would talk about
how the operating system broke up with Theodore, and not vice-versa. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoPlainText" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Let’s talk about Theodore’s profession. He works for a
company that provides written personal letters for paying customers. These are
old-fashioned letters. Mailed and everything, over a period of years. Start a
relationship, hire the company, and they write lovely letters to your
significant other on your behalf. The false intimacy inherent in an online
relationship is not enough. You can create false intimacy in your in-person
relationships with romantic surrogates. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This reminds me of my observations regarding the book
“Gone Girl” (previous post). Our real experiences can never match the ones we
see in the movies and on TV. So, we pretend. In “Her” real persons cannot match
the visions in our minds of what we want. The false intimacy of online
relationships create unknowns which we can dress as we see fit, making it more
acceptable. Fake letters adding fake dimensions to our real relationships,
making them more palatable. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ironic that the operating system (conceived to pretend)
grew beyond the pretend relationship, and demanded more. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-698078148334369102.post-15067495410362250412014-01-05T14:58:00.000-06:002014-09-30T12:59:05.495-05:00Pretend Your Happiness (book: Gone Girl)<br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Gone Girl, written by Gillian Flynn.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">One hopes there are very few people in the world who are
actually like the characters Nick and Amy. Nick is a chameleon, attempting to
adapt to people and make them like him. He is a blank canvas waiting to be
painted. Amy is also a pretender, but she lives to paint the canvas that is
another person. You can see how they fit together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Losing their jobs and then money problems shatters their
game of paint by the numbers. They fall into marriage problem clichés. Though,
Amy's action is definitely not a cliché. Let's just say their marriage is on
the outs. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">At the beginning of Gone Girl, and at the end, Nick asks
himself the same questions about his wife: “What are you thinking? How are you
feeling? Who are you? What have we done to each other?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What will we do?”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>In part he asks because she is hard to read,
but as a chameleon, looking to please others is his basis of operation. Nick
pretends to be what others want. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Amy the pretender: "I was pretending, the way I
often did, pretending to have a personality. I can't help it; it's what I have
always done." While you could argue Nick is a good-natured oaf, Amy is
pure Black Widow Spider. She has no qualms about tying you up and hanging you
out to dry. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Amy and Nick pretended and they were happy together. But,
"it's not a compromise if only one of you considers it such." What is
pretending except a form of compromise, or even capitulation? One stopped
pretending, then the other, to disastrous results. And then they begin to
pretend again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Nick pretends so as save his own neck, and to save any
child of Amy's from Amy. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Amy pretends so she can consume, like a Venus fly trap.
"I'll turn to face him and press myself against him. I'll hold myself to
him like a climbing coiling vine until I have invaded every part of him and
make him mine."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">In the end Nick realizes there are no answers to his
questions. He simply accepts his fate as a canvas being painted by Amy. "I
can feel her changing me again ... I can't imagine my story without Amy. She is
forever my antagonist."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">As for Amy, she has exactly what she wants. "He is
learning to love me unconditionally, under all my conditions."<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Much earlier in the book Nick laments, “It seemed to me
that there was nothing new to be discovered ever again. We were the first human
beings who would never see anything for the first time. We stare at wonders of
the world, dull-eyed, underwhelmed. Mona Lisa, the Pyramids, the Empire State
Building. Jungle animals on attack, ancient icebergs collapsing, volcanoes
erupting. I can’t recall a single amazing thing I have seen firsthand that I
didn’t immediately reference to a movie or TV show. A fucking commercial. You
know the awful singsong of the blasé: Seeeen it. I’ve literally seen it all,
and the worst thing, the thing that makes me want to blow my brains out, is:
The secondhand experience is always better. The image is crisper, the view is
keener, the camera angle and soundtrack manipulate my emotions in a way reality
can’t anymore.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">This is our modern state of existence. Our lives cannot
compete with the lives portrayed in movies and TV. Our lives cannot compete
with the perceived excitement of celebrities, packaged and fed to us by the
media.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And neither can our
relationships. Real life romance pales in comparison. Real life sex is dull and
boring.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">What do we do? We pretend. If you pretend long enough
then it might just feel real. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Stephen Forresthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00880809518951077947noreply@blogger.com0